Saturday, July 21, 2007

A rough few days

As you may or may not know, I have clinical depression. I hate it. Counseling and medications have helped, but I still have some days that are rougher than others. Yesterday and today are those days. All I want to do is sleep. To be alone....like that every happens in household shared by 7 people. How can I be surrounded by people and still feel so lonely? Such a strange dichotomy. My energy is completely zapped.

Yet I know that it is temporary. In a day or two I'll feel just like myself again. Ready to face the world, be the helper my husband needs me to be. Be the mom the kids need me to be. These are the days when I rely on one of my favorite verses from Nehemiah. "For the joy of the Lord is your strength." Even when I am not strong, I can get strength from my Jesus. There is joy in my salvation, even on the days when I don't feel much happiness. Even on those days, I AM SAVED! There is strength in that.

So for today, I will meditate on that. And tomorrow, I pray I'll feel like myself.

Because HE Lives
Tonni

4 comments:

Erin said...

love.

Kate said...

Hugs and Kisses Tonni! You are such a brave, strong, AWESOME--Mother, Wife & Friend. Showers of prayers...

Melissa said...

I think it's great that you are sharing your struggles. There are those of us out there that only wish we had the courage to do so! God bless you and may he draw you closer to himself.

mom of 3 so far said...

I haven't checked in for a while, I'm sorry to hear that things are rough. I feel your pain as I have had a rough time lately as well. Just remember God is bigger than our depression and He will prevail!!!